Ladies and gentlemen, under the direction of Chuck Throckmorton, the Rice University Marching Owl Band presents...
The MOB Presents!
Band takes the field.
I R S
First, The MOB presents: The Internet – the second greatest achievement of our time, right behind the toaster strudel. This series of tubes connects you with others who share your unhealthy obsession with downloading gigabytes of...
Hot... Steamy... Tax code.
Something involving: computers, geeks, and IRS screws
Next, The MOB would present censorship; however, the press box officials will not allow it.
Moving on, The MOB presents: the two-thousand eight Presidential race! We're looking for a candidate with a wide stance on the issues — if you know what I mean.
William Tell Overture
[after opening fanfare in music, formation changes to...]
Candidates race from the end zone to the 30-yard line where there is an "Election '07" banner. Along the way, they kiss babies, grab money, etc. As they approach the 30, an "Election '08" banner pops up in the end zone and they run back to start the process all over again.
The MOB presents: pointless screaming!
Now The MOB presents: college mascots!
An inflatable duck and an oversized Shasta Root Beer can are brought onto the field.
The MOB simultaneously presents: recycling!
Rubber Ducky, from Sesame Street
The duck proceeds to thoroughly crush the root beer can. (No cougars were harmed in the production of this halftime show.)
In all honesty, I'm sure that Shasta the cougar put up a better fight than Shasta the root beer can — and with that, The MOB presents:
A viable exit strategy!
Ladies and gentlemen, the two-thousand seven Rice University Marching Owl Band also brings you: The University of Houston Cougar Marching Band — coming up next.
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